They say cliches are called cliches because they’re true. Some cliches around friendship that I have come across state that friends are like the stars, you don’t always have to see them to know they’re there; another one states that true friends can go years without seeing each other and pick up from where they left off when they do meet.
I know this to be true for me.
I recently spent a weekend with a school friend that I hadn’t seen for 13 years, and the years melted away. She reminded me of the person I was when we were in our teens, getting up to all sorts of mischief and for me, she was still the same person, she hadn’t changed at all, and we slipped into our old familiar ways. There was no effort involved; it felt very natural and rather wonderful. What was interesting was how we each perceived the other’s mother, and the skills and strengths that I admired in her mother and felt to be lacking in mine were the exact same skills and strengths that she recognised in my mother and did not see in her own.
I had no idea of the impact my mother had upon her in those transformative teenage years, and she had no idea of the impact her mother had had on me. We were each shaped by each other’s mother as we were of our own, which for me was a revelation; I hadn’t realised that before.
We are influenced and shaped by those we are in contact with; and for the more significant people in our lives, they can act as role models to actively shape our behaviour and values. Have a little look around your circle of friends and family and see who’s shaping you. Are you the person you want to be or thought you were?